Hello, there! It's always a delight to see your gorgeous faces at my Tea Time. I have a pretty personal topic I wish to discuss today, and I'm thanking you all in advance for the tremendous amount of support you each give me.
Recently, we discussed romantic relationships over the pandemic. We learned how to strengthen our relationships and form new healthy ones. After writing about the positive side of relationships, it got me thinking...what about the negative sides? I want to talk about what to avoid in a relationship by sharing some of the experiences I've had in a previous relationship. This post could be relevant to you now, or for future reference when all of our lives go back to normal and you get the chance to meet someone new.
Freshman year of college, I had a romantic relationship for seven months that wasn't the greatest. Yeah...it was pretty bad. There were so many red flags. Actually, the whole relationship was one big red flag. It was a huge learning experience for me and gave me a clearer insight into what I want in my future romantic partners. In fact, only weeks after I broke up with my ex, I met Will, who exceeded all of my expectations for a relationship.
Please note, these were my personal red flags. Some may resonate with you, others may not. Maybe you've had a completely different toxic experience. Either way, I'm going to educate you on this the best I can.
As we sip our tea today, we're going to talk about red flags to look out for! I've also given personal examples of the red flags I experienced. Why would I share such personal information? Because it's about time I spoke my truth. During the breakup, I left him thinking he was a good boyfriend. He even asked me if he pressured me into anything and I told him no, which was a huge lie. This post is about helping all of you understand unhealthy relationships and helping me reveal the truth that I always suppressed. I know this is a long read, so if you're here just to see the red flags, they're highlighted in red and the first paragraph underneath them has their explanations. The rest of the paragraphs are about the horrible ways my ex treated me, and as you can see, I had a lot to say. But, if I hadn't had such an awful experience, it wouldn't have led to my current boyfriend, who brings magic into my life every day. Well, what are we waiting for... let's get talking!
Red Flags in Them (in no particular order)
1. They try to "claim" you
You are not someone's property. If you SO (significant other) makes you feel chained down, there's an issue. In an effort to claim you, they aggressively make their presence known. Examples include your SO always inviting themselves when you go out, having your location and questioning your whereabouts, texting frequently demanding to know where you are, what you're doing, how long, etc., contacting your friends to know what you're up to and PDA in an effort to discourage anyone else from talking to you.
As for my personal experience, my ex was one time reading up on hickeys (for fun?) and read somewhere that hickeys can be used to claim the person you're with. He loved this idea. No matter how many times I asked him to stop leaving hickeys on my neck, he kept doing it anyway. My biggest gripe about visible hickeys was that I was in the process of getting a new job, where I was in a room with my future boss every single week for the semester. His argument was "other people shouldn't be allowed to judge you on your private life". So as a result, I wore a lot of scarves that winter. But you want to know what was funny? He freaked out on me if I ever got too close to his neck because he didn't want a hickey.
2. They're against feminism
Feminism means that men and women are equal. Nothing more, nothing less. If you SO doesn't believe you should be equal or thinks feminism is nonsense, there's an issue. You are so valuable! Why would you want to be with someone who believes you should be inferior. Your SO doesn't need to go to rallies and marches if that's not their thing, but they should absolutely be respectful of you as a woman and every other woman there is. He should believe that everyone is equal.
Want to know what my ex said to me? "Women have the right to vote, so what other rights do they need? The right to vote makes them equal to men." Yikes. He also told me that the gender pay gap is a myth and gave me articles to try to prove this, made jokes about women belonging in the kitchen, and that he didn't understand the #MeToo movement because he couldn't comprehend sexual assault is a huge issue for women and told me it didn't make sense that so many women were suddenly revealing their experiences. Why didn't I break up with him on the spot? I tried to rationalize his behavior. I thought, "Oh, he's just young and uneducated." I shouldn't have made excuses for him because there was no excuse.
3. They don't respect your boundaries
You are your own person. You have your own needs and interests. There are certain lines you're not willing to cross. Your boundaries can range from how you choose to be intimate all the way to having a fitness routine that you won't compromise. Your SO should be considerate of your boundaries. They shouldn't be trying to change your mind about your beliefs or get you to compromise things that are important to you.
Here's a great example! I told my ex that he wouldn't be able to come over to my dorm for another 30 minutes because I wanted to do a quick yoga flow. He had the nerve to get annoyed with me! He said, "You already did yoga yesterday, why do you have to do it again?!" Once again, you should not have to compromise things that are important to you. Yoga is something that fills me up and makes me feel good. Quality significant others encourage you to do things that make you feel good, not get annoyed about petty things like having to wait for 30 minutes. If he had driven far to see me, maybe I would have budged. But our dorms were a two-minute walk from one another. He had no reason to give me a hard time.
He also got angry at me if I couldn't see him every. single. day. Every day! I had clubs and had just joined a sorority and homework and class and workouts and I was training to be a fitness instructor and I had other friends I wanted to spend time with. Sometimes I just needed to take a nap. He didn't care or understand. If it affected the amount of time he got to spend with me, he'd get angry and guilt me to turn my routine upside down so he could get what he wanted.
4. They pressure you into doing things you don't want to do
No means no! Plain and simple. If you don't want to go further with your SO, that's okay and your SO should be okay with it too. Consent is incredibly important. "No" does not mean "convince me". Forced consent is not consent.
One thing you need to understand about my ex: he was a virgin. He didn't even have his first kiss until he met me. So as you can imagine, all he ever wanted to do was have sex. I'm proud to inform you that he was still a virgin when I broke up with him. LOL. After three months of our relationship, he started getting pushy and wasn't too keen on consent. He even said to me "Sex is supposed to come two months into the relationship. My friend told me." I wouldn't budge, causing him to throw little temper tantrums. He also whined about not wanting to use a condom because "it doesn't feel as good". Once again, he was a virgin. He had never even held a condom. PSA: there is no excuse for skipping out on protection, even if your partner claims it doesn't feel as good.
I'm not going to get too graphic because I have family who reads my blog, but there was a span of several weeks where he was constantly pressuring me to remove a layer of clothing that I wasn't comfortable removing. Finally, I gave in. I didn't do it because I wanted to. I did it because I was so sick of his obnoxious ranting that I caved. I was so nervous when it started happening and I told him I didn't want him to see me like this. Do you know what his response was? "ARE YOU KIDDING ME!" So, I gave him what he wanted. I was so uncomfortable the entire time and even afterward. That night after he left, when I went to go shower, I was still upset. I wasn't comfortable in the shower!! It was just me! Alone! In a locked stall! But that experience was so unpleasant. Because he didn't respect me when I said "no", I wasn't even comfortable in my own privacy that night.
He never fully respected how far I wanted to go. He fought me every time I said no to him about anything intimate. I can recall too many instances where roommates nearly walked in on us. A majority of those times we nearly got walked in on, I had said no to him beforehand but he wouldn't take no for an answer.
You're probably wondering why I stayed with him so long after reading this. Most of the relationship was centered around forced consent! Well, truth be told, I didn't realize how bad the situation was. The worst story I have was the one written above and I didn't think it was that big of an issue because I wasn't assaulted. I didn't have anyone who I was comfortable confiding in about the intimate details of my life. I've always had some shame wrapped around talking about anything sexual, so I never brought it up. Since I never said anything, no one was there to point out that what he was doing was wrong.
There was one time I plucked up the courage to skim the surface of what I was going through. I brought up the fact that he always nagged me to perform oral sex, but I absolutely refused and he made me feel guilty about it every time. The response I got was "Of course he would want you to do that. He's a teenage boy who's never done anything before. It's normal for him! If anything, I would be worried if he didn't ask you to do those things!" I felt shut down and didn't talk about the issue anymore.
I want to let you all know that I'm okay! Trust me, I'm okay, but I wanted to share this story because if you're in a similar situation, this is your sign to get out of that relationship.
5. They disregard your needs
In my post about Relationships During the Pandemic, I discussed how important it is to know what you want in a relationship. For example, wanting to go out regularly for date nights, having quality conversations, respecting one another's space, hanging out together with friends, and hand-holding are just a few of the things that could be important to you in a relationship. If you bring all of these things up to your SO and they don't even try to meet your needs, you're in for a miserable relationship. It's not uncommon for your SO to have different needs than you, but as long as you both discuss these needs and work on compromises, you could both be really happy together. That's why communication is so important. Relationships get tricky if you have nothing in common. Another example is if one of you wants to go out partying every single night but the other hates anything involving people gathering and then refuses to work something out with you, you're going to have a huge issue.
My ex and I never went on dates. Never. How did we get together, then? Because we watched a few movies on a laptop a couple of times. Our first "date" wasn't until about a month into our relationship. We went to the diner on campus. I always asked him if we could go uber into town or take the bus to a cafe, but he never wanted to. He complained that he didn't have time or money and made a million excuses. He would say "I don't want to go out and no means no." For a boy that didn't respect me when I said no about sexual encounters, that was a really horrible thing for him to say.
My favorite was "We went to the mall with our friends last week, why do you need to go out again?" and then proceeded to guilt me into staying in the dorm and pressured me into being intimate. This was a normal weekend type of situation. He always had time to be horny, but no time to honor what I wanted in the relationship.
He was also killer boring. As you could tell, he never wanted to do anything or go anywhere. We hardly even had interesting conversations. The only time he would become animated and actually excited to talk to me when it was him lecturing me about sex. The virgin that went to Catholic school who's only sex eduction was porn tried lecturing me about sex. He also enjoyed engaging in anti-feminist conversations. Other than that, talking to him was like watching paint dry.
I wanted someone that I could have thrilling conversations with until late at night, someone to bounce ideas off of and to go on adventures with. I picked the wrong person. But, I learned all of the things I valued in a relationship from these experiences and ended up with a much more compatible person to me once I broke up with my ex.
6. They appear to have crushes on other people
Your SO should be fully dedicated to you and only you, in the romantic sense. If they're hanging out with one specific person all the time and you're getting bad vibes from the situation, trust your gut. If you have any reason to believe that your partner is cheating or looks like they could, there's an issue. If they also appear to still be in love with their ex, that's another issue.
I believe my ex had crushes on two other people. He was still in love with his high school crush. He would show me photos of her from high school where she was wearing a sports bra and shorts. What's worse is that these photos were saved on his phone. Then he would look at the photos fondly and just stare for a little too long. He also constantly was in contact with her and was way too obsessed with her sex life. The other girl he had a crush on was a mutual friend of ours. She liked him back. They too were also in constant contact with one another and his demeanor changed every time she was nearby. He knew too much about her sex life as if he was trying to say, "See? She has sex so why don't you?". I really don't understand why I chose to be with someone who didn't value me.
7. They don't want you meeting their friends/family
If you've both been dating someone for a while and are serious about the relationship, you've probably introduced one another to other significant people in your life. If your SO constantly makes excuses for you not to meet the people in their life, it's an issue, unless of course there's a valid reason that your SO disclosed with you. It's a problem because your SO is trying to hide you or they don't think the relationship is serious enough.
My ex didn't let me meet his closest friends from high school and he was constantly making fun of my friends behind their backs and to my face. He also refused to say hi to them when they crossed paths. Not okay.
8. They tell you how you should look and what you should be doing
Let's get this straight. If your partner is encouraging you to wear blouses more because they think you look pretty in them, that's one thing. If they say you should get into a fitness routine because they care for your health, they're allowed to give you gentle encouragement. Your SO is allowed to make encouraging comments out of a place of love and they'll respect your boundaries if you say no. What I mean here is if your partner is demanding you to shave certain areas that you don't want to, shaming your body, or aggressively telling you that you should be wearing certain clothes. They shouldn’t be telling you who to spend time with or demanding you pick up certain habits, like dying your hair more because they don’t find your natural hair pretty or drinking more at parties. They shouldn’t be demanding you, period. You NEVER have to do or wear something you're uncomfortable with.
My ex was the worst when it came to this. He whined about how he wished my stomach had abs. He complained that he hated all types of body hair and demanded I shave it all off. He wanted me to change in ways I didn't want to. He wanted me to work out more so I could have a bigger butt. Sometimes the comments were subtle and seemed harmless but other times, they were awful. Like the time he flat out told me, "You're only cute. You're not hot". Or on my birthday, when he scolded me for twenty minutes about how I should be wearing more revealing clothing and wear thong bathing suits. I broke up with him two weeks later because that was the final straw. He said the reason he wanted me to wear revealing clothing was that he thought my body should be shown off since he loved me so much and found me beautiful. Umm...see the next point.
9. They say "it's only because I love you so much" in an effort to belittle
If you call out your partner for making you uncomfortable and they say "it's only because I love you so much", run away, sis. That's manipulation.
It's never okay for someone to make you uncomfortable and try to justify it. If your SO made you uncomfortable, you should feel safe letting them know and they should apologize immediately, followed by them changing their actions. It doesn't matter how beautiful, sexy, or wonderful they tell you that you are. It doesn't matter how much they claim to love you. You shouldn't be getting pressured into anything then have your feelings dismissed.
My ex used this phrase all the time when he made me upset. I rationalized it and thought, maybe he does love me a lot and that's why he's pushing me to do all these things. NO!!! NO!! He did this all the time to justify his horniness. *barf* And after telling me that he loved me, he would try to justify himself further.
Y'ALL ARE NOT GOING TO EXPECT WHAT I'M ABOUT TO SAY NEXT!! If he noticed how uncomfortable about sex he was making me, he would put on That 70's Show and pick episodes all about sex. He would say "See! Watch this! Sex isn't bad! You should be fine with all of this! They're all okay with sex so you should have nothing to worry about!" There was also one line in the show about men doing all the work while having sex and women do nothing. My ex verbally and confidently agreed. Once again, he was a virgin. Watching those episodes made me feel even more pressured. He kept forcing me to come around to the idea of putting out.
10. They make you feel bad about money
If your SO wants to pay for your dates and buy you little presents, that's great! It becomes an issue when they insist on paying for everything but then blame you for not having enough money. They tell you things like "you're too expensive". Even if you offer to pay for you half of the date, they freak out and say you can't, then complain that they're broke. You are not responsible for how they chose to spend their money! If your SO doesn't want you paying for stuff, they shouldn't be guilting you about it.
This story cracks people up every time. My ex always complained about how he didn't have any money and that he spent too much on me, even though we didn't go on any dates. He said buying me Dunkin every week was adding up and he was getting annoyed, even though he was the one offering. I also always got a small iced tea, which is way cheaper than a coffee. Do you know what he was paying for his Dunkin with? His dining hall meal plan. That his dad purchased.
11. They thinking helping you out once is enough
You have your wants and needs in a relationship. Maybe you like going out on dates or taking long walks with your partner. Maybe you're in the middle of moving out of your house and could use a little extra help packing. Maybe you like it when your SO opens doors for you or escorts you to class. Whatever it is, your SO should want to do these things to make sure you're happy and in turn, you should want to make your SO happy as well. Being there for one another should be constant for the whole relationship. It's not okay if, for example, your SO took you to the movies once two weeks ago and refuses to go out on another date because "I just took you out on a date".
My ex was always saying that phrase. Going on a date once a month was good enough for him. For me, I value quality time and adventure, so I wanted to go on a few more dates. And he would make me feel bad for wanting to go out more. See the second paragraph of red flag 5.
12. They're not chivalrous
I don't mean they have to be a knight that jousts and duels his enemies. I mean they should be a gentleman or a lady to you at all times and give the same respect to everyone else. Things like holding open a door for you and then waiting for the strangers (or friends!) behind you to come in as well. If they bring you a coffee, maybe they bring some for the friends you're with too. Maybe they're not into romantic gestures or don't have a ton of money to treat you and your friends. That's totally okay! As long as they're a kind human being that offers that same kindness to everyone else, they can be deemed chivalrous. Of course, they'll treat you with a little extra love because you're their partner. :) If your SO is only nice to you and is a jerk or indifferent towards everyone else, it's only a matter of time before they start acting the same towards you.
Would you like another laugh? Of course, you do! One time, I was with my ex and a mutual friend. They were both talking and then my ex said: "I can't curse in front of her, I have to be her gentleman." Let me tell you, folks, that was his only standard of being a gentleman. Not using curse words in front of me. Need more proof about my ex's gentleman like tendencies? On my birthday, I asked him if he could open the car door for me and he yelled at me. In front of other people! The nerve! As comical as this all is, let this serve as a reminder to never lower your standards.
13. There's always something to fight about
It's normal for couples to disagree from time to time. But if there's always drama in your relationship, is it really a healthy one? If the fights are always about small things, chances are, you're always annoyed by them and probably not in love. If you're constantly fighting about big things, maybe you feel trapped in your relationship and I encourage you to talk to a professional to help navigate your feelings. Disagreeing throughout the relationship is normal especially if you've been together for a while. If you're experiencing arguments in the beginning stages in your relationship, this is not the right person for you.
I don't have a long paragraph for this one, but we had frequent disagreements. Given that it was a short term relationship, we fought too much. I've had fewer arguments in my relationship of almost two years than I did in my relationship of seven months.
14. They don't support you
Your partner might not understand everything you do. Maybe they don't understand your love for art or passion for fitness. Whatever your thing is, it doesn't matter if they don't understand. What's important is that they support you. They encourage you to do what makes you happy and may even attempt to understand why you do what you do. Maybe they'll even go out of their comfort zone to participate in your interests. If you're getting no support or even backlash from your SO, something needs to change. Your SO should be at your side no matter what and want what's best for you. They shouldn't be trying to hold you back in life.
I went out for sorority recruitment freshman year when I was about 3 months into my relationship with my ex. He hated the idea of the sorority, no matter how much I emphasized that it was important to me. He told me I'd get hazed (which I didn't) and constantly discouraged me from going out to parties. His reasoning? "I've seen movies about sororities! I know what goes on! You better not cheat on me in a frat basement! Don't get alcohol poisoning!" He had a completely warped sense of what Greek life was and he tried to hold me back. We argued every time I went to a sorority event. All I ever got was resistance.
15. They're jealous
Your SO shouldn't be making you feel bad for having casual conversations with other people. They shouldn't make you feel guilty about spending time with your friends and family. They shouldn't make you feel that you have to hide your accomplishments. A little jealousy is normal because it shows that your SO cares about you and doesn't want to lose you to someone else. But if they're always green with envy and it's affecting how you live your life, it's a huge red flag.
There's no question about the fact that I like men. I do. Like Chris Hemsworth. Such a gorgeous man! Anyway, my ex one time saw my Instagram discover page and freaked out. Between the pictures of cute puppies and workout videos, there were pictures of hot shirtless men. His voice went shrilly when he said: "You know the Instagram Discover page says a lot about a person!!" He was humiliated. I know it was because he's insecure about his body, but that was a ridiculous reaction.
He was also jealous of my intelligence. He complained that I was always getting Dean's List and had a really high GPA and blah blah blah. It was because he didn't feel smart enough. He was jealous every time I got a good grade. He was jealous that I was friends with a lot of people on campus. He was jealous that people sent me text messages on my birthday instead of just Snapchats. I'm not kidding. Remember, jealousy is rooted in insecurity.
Red Flags in you
I don't have a ton to say about myself with all of these red flags, but please know that I experienced each and every one of them.
1. You think in terms of breaking up
Maybe you don't want to book a vacation too far in advance because you think you'll break up. Maybe you don't want to tell certain friends you're in a relationship because you think you'll be single soon enough. Maybe you don't want to share personal information with your SO because you don't want them to hold your secrets against you if you break up. If you justify your reasoning, whatever it is, with "I'm not going to do this because we're going to break up soon", you should just end it now. People in love don't think about breaking up.
I thought in terms of breaking up quite a bit. Example: I didn't want to log in to my Spotify account on his laptop because I knew he would want to use it and I knew the relationship wasn't going to last. One time I accidentally forgot to log out on his laptop and he had access to my premium account! I was so upset because I didn't want him to use something I was paying for when we broke up. Thankfully, it magically logged him out while we were still dating so I lived the rest of my relationship in peace knowing that he couldn't keep using my stuff.
2. You're embarrassed to be seen in public with them
If you find yourself hoping not many people see you acting like a couple, that's a red flag. You shouldn't be embarrassed by the things they do, either. Being embarrassed by the way they dress, eat, style their hair, and the list of embarrassing things go on, you probably don't like them as much as you say you do. If you really wanted to be with this person, you wouldn't be embarrassed by them! You should want to be with you SO out in the open.
3. You're annoyed with them after spending long amounts of time with them
When you're totally obsessed with someone, you want to spend all your time with them. If you can spend a whole day with them, you rejoice. Even better if you can get a whole weekend with them! But if you spend several hours with your partner and can't wait for them to get out of your hair, chances are you don't like them as much as you think you do. You should want to spend as much time with them as possible. You might even miss them after they're gone for the day.
If you're currently quarantined with your partner and spending 24/7 with them, it's normal for you to be annoyed. You both need your space! This point is referring to spending time with one another when life is "normal".
4. You constantly seek reassurance about your relationship
Do you catch yourself telling people how "great" your relationship is so often it seems like you're convincing yourself? Do you try to show off the things you do with your SO to get people to tell you that you look happy? But even after you receive the compliments you were fishing for, you still don't totally believe you're happy. Constantly doubting your relationship and seeking out external validation isn't a good sign. When you're truly happy in a relationship, you don't care what other people think.
5. You check out other people and wonder what it would feel like to be in a different relationship
If you were in love, you wouldn't be dreaming about escaping your relationship and finding someone better. Plain and simple. It's normal for you to find other people cute while you're dating someone. Cute people don't just disappear once you find your SO. The red flag is when you dream about dating other people and start finding yourself unhappy in your relationship because of it.
6. It's too easy to talk bad about them
If you're always gossiping about your SO, you're probably not in the right relationship. Even in a healthy relationship, if you fight, you don't say mean things behind their back. If you notice your favorite thing to talk about is your partner's flaws, consider it a red flag.
7. You don't find them attractive
Maybe your SO is the ugliest person in the world. I'm not saying that they are, I'm just saying in the hypothetical sense. It doesn't matter if everyone thinks they're ugly. If you're in love, you'll think they're the most gorgeous person to ever live. And that's how it should be! If you're not attracted to your partner, both physically and mentally, you don't have the right chemistry to be with one another. That's totally normal, but you're not entitled to stay in a relationship with a person you aren't attracted to just because they're nice.
8. You don't feel comfortable being intimate with them
In case you need a reminder, look again at points 4 and 11 in the "Red Flags in Them" section. You should NEVER EVER EVER feel uncomfortable around your partner. Everything must be consensual! Clear communication at all times is crucial so no lines get crossed. If you feel like you're always being pressured or start dreading private time with your SO, you need to get out of there. No amount of discomfort is acceptable. Stop rationalizing with it or you may do something you regret.
9. You make excuses for their behavior
Your SO should not make you feel uncomfortable, angry, or belittled. If you constantly feel negative emotions as a result of the way they treat you but try to rationalize with their behavior, they're not the right person for you. Maybe you think "they're just doing this because they're insecure" or "they just don't know any better and they'll learn eventually" or "they love me so much and would never mean to hurt me". Making excuses for the horrible ways your SO treats you is a sign you're being manipulated or blinded to your reality. You shouldn't feel hurt by your partner then make up a story in your head about why it was justified that they could hurt you. There is no good reason for them to treat you poorly. There's even a chance that you recognize that you're seeing red flags but choose to ignore them. From an outsider's point of view, it's easy to wonder why a person would ignore all these red flags. When you're in the thick of the relationship and start sensing red flags, you don't want to believe a person could treat you so poorly and rationalize the behavior.
If your SO is pressuring you into doing sexual things you aren't comfortable with, it's not fair to you to justify their behavior. No means no! It doesn't matter if they're a virgin and are horny all the time. It doesn't matter how much they claim to love you. You should never feel uncomfortable or pressured! DO NOT JUSTIFY YOUR PARTNER PRESSURING YOU INTO SEXUAL ACTIVITY. I made this mistake and was miserable in my relationship for months without realizing it! I told myself it wasn't that bad, but looking back, I excused all the awful ways my ex treated me and let him get away with it.
10. You're only dating them because you're lonely
I understand loneliness. I understand how it feels to want a significant other. I caved in to my loneliness and settled for someone who treated me horribly. Don't lower your standards just because you want some action in your dating life! Stay strong. Stay true to yourself. Surround yourself with those who love you. Don't date someone just for the sake of dating them. Not only will it hurt you, but it could potentially hurt the other person involved. No one should feel that they're not valued.
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Wow, that was a lot. Thank you for listening to my story. I hope that my experiences help guide you in picking out what relationships are healthy and which aren't. And if you make a few mistakes along the way or ignore red flags, forgive yourself. Forgive yourself for allowing yourself to get into a bad situation. You deserve to be treated with self-compassion.
If you know someone who's in a toxic relationship, try gently bringing it up to them. If your friend resists, don't press further. Maybe the red flags are blatantly obvious, but your friend might not be willing to see them just yet. Continue helping them by staying at their side and comforting them when they need it. It's not your job to fix their relationships, but you can call the hotline number I'm going to share below if you're really concerned.
If you're in a dangerously unhealthy relationship or think you're being abused, there's no shame in reaching out for help. Here is a confidential hotline number to the National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).
Hopefully, you have more awareness about red flags in relationships after reading this. Remember, you are a valuable person. You deserve to be treated with respect. You deserve someone who can love you fully. You don't have to settle for someone who isn't worthy of your love.
If you found this post helpful, please please subscribe below so you never miss an update! I hope my words have served you well. :)
Stay strong, my loves.
Camryn